If we can throw tea overboard, maybe we should throw overboard some of those imports that are coming here from China. Can we apply the “no taxation without representation” slogans to the Chinese and the Japanese too?
Today is tax day, that is “T” day, now become tea bag day. The British put a tax on tea, that caused the revolution, George Washington, the constitution, the “bill of rights,” thus the right to carry a gun, no shootin'.
Do you get it? April 15th shall now and forever be known as “Conservatives' Day” or “No tax day,” “T”day, tea day, tea bag day and don't forget gun totin' day. The two basic conservative principles out of which everything grows in the party today are no taxes but plenty o' guns.
So the Republican Party, the party of Lincoln is built on that. But this means that anyone who suggests any kind of tax is a taxin' liberal become socialist and those actually passing any taxin' law is communist. You also a fascist if your party is in power. So the Democrat Party is stuck with dat. No shootun'.
So this is what today's Tea Bag Day is all about. Those losing on the stock market, those losing their jobs and those losing their homes are now excited over celebrating tea bags and how dat is going to help them in coming days and in the future. Why not? Let's shoot our guns and celebrate. Maybe we can fling tea bags in the air and shoot dem.
Then we'll need more bullets and this will simulate the economy. Unregulated bullet production is the way to get free enterprising going once again. And then let's go shooton' those dang African pi-rats. That'll take a few bullets too.
It's better than giving billions to those trying to enrich themselves on the stock market. Let's shot some whiskey bottles from behind the bar and let's get ourselves a Whiskey Rebellion goin' too, while we're at it. They were also a taxin' whiskey We can get a real armed rebellion goin” again. That will get whiskey production goin' too.
Well now that we have tea day, we know who dem conservatives are and who dose red communists are. Ya hoo!